Thinking Out Loud 10/10/18

I was thinking today about priorities, and how some folks seem to have theirs a little mixed up. I’m sure that could also have been said about me at various times in my life. As you move through life your responsibilities and your priorities change.

When I was young, my priorities were taking care of my kids, maintaining my marriage, and working to keep the bills paid. That last one probably came first more often than not, because it had to. Working wasn’t an option, at least for me. I was raised with a strong work ethic and you kept a job and took care of your financial responsibilities no matter what.

Unfortunately a steady income wasn’t always a priority with my exes, neither was our marriage, sadly. One spouse actually told me on more than one occasion that I was the number three priority in his life, right behind marijuana and making music with the band. Naive as I was, I thought I’d move up in rank with time. In thirteen years I never did.

One thing I’ve learned about successful marriages is that no matter how different you might be from each other, you’ve got to be on the same page when it comes to your priorities and goals in life.

Now that I am retired and my kids are grown and on their own, my priorities are focused on faith, spending time with Papa Bear, taking care of the furkids and house, bettering myself, and reaching out to friends and family with a little encouragement when I can. Note that nowhere in that list do you see fame, fortune, power, image, partying, or acquiring lots of stuff. Those things have little value to me.

I also have little time for people who are loud, self-absorbed, contentious, close-minded, prejudiced, entitled, or morally bankrupt. I prefer to surround my myself with kind, positive people who are trying to be the best they can be and don’t hesitate to reach out to help others. The company you keep matters.

I think it’s important to re-evaluate our priorities now and then, taking an honest look at where, what, and with whom we are spending our time and energy. It is never to late in life to choose a new direction, to become more true to yourself. With each year I am becoming more me, and it feels good!


Author: Josie Two Shoes

I've been blogging off and on since August of 2006. I adopted the pen name Josie Two Shoes in 2007 as I began a new chapter of my life standing on my own two feet. Now I'm married to the man of my dreams; we live in dusty West Texas with a house full of furkids. I am an Aquarian by birth, and although I am past sixty and slightly frayed around the edges, my fascination with this thing called life continues. Faith, family, and friends are important to me; so are honesty, trust, tolerance, compassion and kindness. I'm pretty up front about most things, so if you want to know something more about me, just ask! :-) You can also reach me by email and find me at my Facebook page.

12 thoughts on “Thinking Out Loud 10/10/18”

  1. I like your values. I’m still working on things with my first husband and while we often seem to be polar opposites, our life-goals and basic values are the same. We’re also very good at compromise and think that good compromises are better than anything one of us could have come up with on our own.

    1. Compromise is the best way to keep a marriage strong, and I agree that the best solutions come from that. Also, neither partner feels that their needs and desires are being ignored. Kudos to you for finding ways to make it work!

      1. I think part of our success is that we consider ourselves to be equal partners. That said, we also have our ‘departments’. For instance, he loves fixing things while but detests weeding the garden. Oddly enough, I enjoy weeding. We were also good friends before we considered a romantic interest.

      2. This is where opposites are at their best! We each have things to bring to a relationship and mutual respect is critical. True friendship will keep a marriage going strong. Papa Bear and I are best friends and I cherish that!

  2. “With each year I am becoming more me, and it feels good!” I know exactly what you mean. Took awhile for me to let me be the real me. For much of my life, I hid behind what/who I thought I was “supposed” to be or what/who I thought others wanted me to be. And I wondered why I was so unhappy?!

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